Promenading along Portobello Road we stop by a stall packed with archaic gewgaw. Scrutinizing the rubble, I say to my better: 'These fossils look man-made to me.'
The corpulent termagant behind the stall looks at me bemused and informs me that her husband is an archaeologist. 'Yeah, I say,and my husband is a great big official in the government, ready and willing to knock out all those pretty front teeth of yours.'

Just a touch of evil...