So this afternoon, while jauntily skipping along the high street, I ran in to a former co-fornicator. We had parted amicably and seen each other since, but today I wasn’t in the mood for catching-up when he said: ‘Come for a drink.’ I forced a smile and said: ‘I can’t.’ His eyes fixed on my face in a look with which a man reconnoitres all women whom he suspects of lying and said: ‘Why not?’ Oh poppycock, I thought, why not?! And said what I usually say in these situations: ‘Because I promised my dog I’d take him to the park.’ He looked at me with a faint trace of surprise on his face and said: ‘I didn’t know you had a dog.’ I spent the next ten minutes telling him about a dog I do NOT have, which in hindsight was much more laborious than that drink would have been. Silly, silly...